Top 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts
By: Brian Kim - October 2, 2007
First off, there are those who are reading this who might not know which camp they fall into, the extrovert or the introvert. Chances are, the majority of those reading this will know, but for those who don’t, let’s define those two terms here very broadly.
Extroverts tend to be those who are more energized when around other people. They are the ones who will reach for the cell phone when alone for more than a minute, the ones who love to go out every weekend, the ones who love to chit chat, mingle, and socialize.
Introverts tend to be those who are more energized when alone with themselves. They are the ones who have to be dragged to parties, who are the first ones ready to leave after a short period of time, and who generally enjoy solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming.
The qualities and characteristics of introverts are often held in a negative light in today’s world, so it’s only natural that the majority of people seem to think that there’s something wrong with them.
The reason why the majority of people think that there’s something wrong with introverts is because the majority of people aren’t very knowledgeable when it comes to introverts, in terms of why they are the way they are and why they do the things they do.
Many people tend to hold several potentially damaging misconceptions about introverts, but through no fault of their own.
I’ve been on both sides of the extrovert/introvert fence, and I can understand why extroverts tend to view introverts in a negative light, socially speaking, so I thought it would be best to write an article dedicated to helping extroverts understand their often very misunderstood introvert counterparts.
My hope is this article will help solve that problem by shedding some light as to why introverts are the way they are and do the things they do, so here are 5 things every extrovert should know about introverts.
1. If a person is introverted, it does NOT mean they are shy or anti-social.
This is probably THE biggest misconception that extroverts tend to have when it comes to introverts.
And you can’t really blame them for having that kind of misconception.
Extroverts tend to have to drag introverts to parties, to convince them to go and sell them on attending social engagements. When introverts politely decline, extroverts automatically assume that something might be wrong so they always ask if everything’s all right and of course, everything is all right. It’s just a common misunderstanding. When extroverts see a pattern like this developing, they automatically assume that introverts are shy or anti-social as that can be the only logical explanation to them.
What’s more, when extroverts try to engage introverts in small talk, it seems like they hit a brick wall.
Add to that, most extroverts see that introverts tend to be fond of engaging in solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming.
Well, if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it must be a duck right?
Wrong.
Introverts have more brain activity in their frontal lobes and when these areas are activated through solitary activity, introverts become energized through processes such as problem solving, introspection, and complex thinking.
Extroverts on the other hand tend to have more activity in the back of their brain, areas that deal with processing sensory information from the external world, so they tend to search for external stimuli in the form of interacting with other people and the outside world to energize them.
There’s a deeper science to this that involves differences in the levels of brain chemicals such as acetylcholine and dopamine in extroverts and introverts, but I won’t get into that.
The bottom line is that introverts are just wired differently than extroverts. There’s nothing “wrong” with them. They just become energized through different processes depending on where the majority of their brain activity takes place.
Granted there are introverts who may be shy and anti-social, but that’s just a coincidence that perpetuates the myth that ALL introverts are like that.
You’ll find that all introverts are fine just the way they are until people begin to subtly suggest otherwise.
2. Introverts tend to dislike small talk.
If you really want to engage an introvert in conversation, skip the small talk. Introverts tend to love deep conversations on subjects that interest them. They love to debate, go past the superficial and poke around the depths in people’s minds to see what’s really going on in there. Most, if not all introverts tend to regard small talk as a waste of time, unless it’s with someone new they just met.
This characteristic probably contributes to another misconception that extroverts have of introverts - the misconception that all introverts are arrogant.
Why?
Because extroverts notice that introverts don’t talk that much with other people. Therefore, extroverts assume that introverts think they’re too good to talk to others, hence arrogant and that’s hardly the case.
It’s just a matter of preference.
Extroverts thrive on small talk.
Introverts abhor it.
There’s nothing wrong with either choice, it’s just a matter of preference.
This brings us to the third point.
3. Introverts do like to socialize – only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.
Yes, it’s true. Contrary to the majority of public opinion, introverts do like to socialize, but again, only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.
Introverts love anything that involves deep conversation. They get energized by discussing subjects that are important to them and they love see what and how other people think, to connect the dots, to dig deep, to find root causes, to use logical thinking via debate in conversation, etc.
And what’s more, introverts can do a lot of things extroverts are naturally good at - give great speeches, schmooze with everyone, be the life of the party, charm the socks off of total strangers - but only for a short period of time. After that, they need time for themselves which brings us to the fourth point.
4. Introverts need time alone to recharge.
Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions.
They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries.
5. Introverts are socially well adjusted.
Most introverts are well aware of all the social nuances, customs, and mannerisms when it comes to interacting with other people, but they simply don’t choose to socialize as much as extroverts, which makes it easy for extroverts to assume that introverts are not socially well adjusted, as they have not seen much evidence of them interacting with other people.
This just exacerbates previous misconceptions and gives way to labeling introverts as nerds, geeks, loners, etc.
It’s easy to understand why society tends to value extroverts over introverts. Human beings have lived in a tribal society so having to interact frequently with people came to be a regarded as a very good skill when it came to survival.
But because of this high value placed on extroversion, introverts tend to feel trapped and find themselves in a catch 22 situation.
Do introverts stay true to who they are and risk social alienation and isolation or do introverts conform and join the extroverted side, pretending to be somebody they’re not just to fit in?
This is precisely why I wrote this article, because if the extroverts can become more educated about introverts, introverts will be able to feel free to stay true to who they are, and that’s a good thing from society’s point of view.
Trying to “turn” an introverted person into an extroverted person is detrimental because it gives off a subtle suggestion that there is something wrong with them, hampering their self worth and esteem when there is absolutely nothing wrong in the first place.
There’s nothing wrong with introverts.
In fact, introverts are the leading pioneers of advancements in human civilization. Albert Einstein, Issac Newton, Charles Darwin are a few introverts that come to mind, just to name a few.
And for those of you not interested in science, but pop culture, you’ll be surprised to see a lot of well known names in Hollywood are introverts as well. Julia Roberts, Steven Spielberg, Christian Bale to name a few as well.
And for those interested in sports, Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods come to mind as athletes who are introverts as well.
Introverts have a lot to bring to the table. They have an amazing ability to discover new thoughts, an uncanny ability to focus, to concentrate, to connect the dots, to observe and note things that most people miss, to listen extremely well and are often found having a rich and vivid imagination too.
The more extroverts become knowledgeable about introverts, the less tension and misunderstanding there will be among the two.
So if you’re an introvert reading this, send a copy of this article to all your extrovert friends so they can get a better idea of what you’re all about.
It’s time to finally clear the air.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Know Yourself
I love learning about personalities and individual's differences. We all have different strengths and weaknesses and have to interact with other people who have different combinations. As you probably know, this can cause all sorts of reactions when two people try to relate to eachother. Sometimes the resulting interactions are positive, and other times negative. Some people live easily with eachother, and some people are always getting on eachother's nerves!
I believe that God has knitted us together from before we were even born, and has given us each and completely unique combination of gifts, so that we can go into the world and do good things which He has designed us to do. Some people are put together with the ideal temperament, personality, abilities etc to be a tradesman. Others, to be a nurse, a teacher, a lawyer, etc.
One huge reason why I love personality studies etc, is because I know it can help people find what they are good at, and therefore, what area of work they should get into... and then they are more likely to enjoy their lives! No one person is the same as the next, and we should never put ourselves into a labelled box, but having a general idea is better than having no idea, don't you think! As I said earlier, we have been DESIGNED with a certain purpose in mind. I personally think that you NEED TO KNOW who you are, in order to live out God's will for your life. If you don't spend time figuring out who you were made to be, then you will spend your life being who you THINK YOU ARE. There's a difference. For example, I could think that I am an awesome bank manager, and do everything I can to live out this belief. As long as everyone else thinks i'm cool and I am earning money etc who cares right?! Wrong! The reality is that my personality, how my brain works, what I enjoy, etc, don't line up with that! I am being fake, for whatever reason... maybe to fit in or please others?
(btw, I once worked in a bank and didn't enjoy it! But I did get to wear a suit to impress other people! Sounds lame to me now, but I actually wanted to wear a suit back then so that other people would be impressed. How embarrassing!)
If I had known about my strengths and weaknesses and giftings, then I wouldn't have struggled away for months in that bank! Don't get me wrong, God can use all things for good, and I did learn a few things, but sometimes you just don't need to do everything the hard way!
One one the most life changing times of my life was at Ministry Training College, when I discovered The Myers-Briggs personality test. It gave me such a clear picture of who I am. As I said, it's just a guide, but a scarily accurate one at that! Sometimes I fit the box, sometimes a bit less, but it has been incredibly helpful to me in the last 5 years when dealing with other people and myself. I highly recommend this tool, to help you learn about yourself, because if you don't continually learn about yourself, how can you love others as youself? And how can you live an authentic life if you are pretending to be something you aren't? If you know you you are, then you can start to accept that, then you are free to love others.
There's heaps of different sites to try out, but these are a couple of good ones :)
hwww.personalitypage.com
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers-Briggs_Type_Indicator
I believe that God has knitted us together from before we were even born, and has given us each and completely unique combination of gifts, so that we can go into the world and do good things which He has designed us to do. Some people are put together with the ideal temperament, personality, abilities etc to be a tradesman. Others, to be a nurse, a teacher, a lawyer, etc.
One huge reason why I love personality studies etc, is because I know it can help people find what they are good at, and therefore, what area of work they should get into... and then they are more likely to enjoy their lives! No one person is the same as the next, and we should never put ourselves into a labelled box, but having a general idea is better than having no idea, don't you think! As I said earlier, we have been DESIGNED with a certain purpose in mind. I personally think that you NEED TO KNOW who you are, in order to live out God's will for your life. If you don't spend time figuring out who you were made to be, then you will spend your life being who you THINK YOU ARE. There's a difference. For example, I could think that I am an awesome bank manager, and do everything I can to live out this belief. As long as everyone else thinks i'm cool and I am earning money etc who cares right?! Wrong! The reality is that my personality, how my brain works, what I enjoy, etc, don't line up with that! I am being fake, for whatever reason... maybe to fit in or please others?
(btw, I once worked in a bank and didn't enjoy it! But I did get to wear a suit to impress other people! Sounds lame to me now, but I actually wanted to wear a suit back then so that other people would be impressed. How embarrassing!)
If I had known about my strengths and weaknesses and giftings, then I wouldn't have struggled away for months in that bank! Don't get me wrong, God can use all things for good, and I did learn a few things, but sometimes you just don't need to do everything the hard way!
One one the most life changing times of my life was at Ministry Training College, when I discovered The Myers-Briggs personality test. It gave me such a clear picture of who I am. As I said, it's just a guide, but a scarily accurate one at that! Sometimes I fit the box, sometimes a bit less, but it has been incredibly helpful to me in the last 5 years when dealing with other people and myself. I highly recommend this tool, to help you learn about yourself, because if you don't continually learn about yourself, how can you love others as youself? And how can you live an authentic life if you are pretending to be something you aren't? If you know you you are, then you can start to accept that, then you are free to love others.
There's heaps of different sites to try out, but these are a couple of good ones :)
hwww.personalitypage.com
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers-Briggs_Type_Indicator
Saturday, January 22, 2011
New Years Revolutions
Well, another year has been and gone, with all the ups and downs that i've come to expect from life. My biggest high of the year was when I bought my first home. I had been working and saving for a number of years, feeling like I would never gather enough money to get a deposit. It was made more difficult with banks requiring higher and higher deposits due to the global financial situation. But, literally overnight, I had put in an offer and had it accepted! It was so exciting!
The place needed a lot of work. So I replaced the carpet, curtains, flooring, splashed a bit of paint around and did some landscaping. The crowing glory has to be my hardwood deck out the back, replacing the wasteland area the had been there for 30 years. Working in the trades has allowed me to get free plants, and cheaper timber etc, which has really helped on a tight budget. I'm really proud of myself, buying and renovating a home all by myself. The next plan is to build a garden shed!
But that's not what I wanted to talk about. My New Years resolution, (or Revolution) as I like to call them, was an original idea. To get fit. Basically, I had had enough of being called fatty, even though it was mostly in a joking way, and decided to do something about it. I joined the gym.
I have a top-class facility only 2mins drive or 7mins cycle from my place. I have been going for three weeks now, at least 4-5 times per week. It's not the first time I have been to a gym. I used to play a lot of competitive sport and have been through at least a dozen memberships over the years. I used most of them ;). So this is nothing new for me in that sense. I guess what feels new is my attitude. I would say that this time I have some real determination and discipline that hasn't always been there. It's encouraging to know that I have grown in this area.
My first discouragement came after two weeks when I weighed myself, only to see that I was EXACTLY the same weight. 10 hard workouts down and I hadn't shed even one fraction of a KG! It was at this point that my trainer said, "You don't just lose weight instantly, you have to do the ground work and build muscle (which actually adds weight) before you start to lose it. He also said that weight isn't too important, your body shape, and how you feel is what's important.
Anyway... I guess what i'm trying to say is this: In the whole area of change, the most important thing is to keep doing the right thing, the results will take care of themselves. Keep focussed on the goal, put in the work and the rest will happen. Don't allow yourself to get discouraged because things don't happen the way you want them to. It's the longer term that's more important.
So keep doing the hard work, even when it feels like there is no evidence of change or growth or anyone else even noticing a thing. Try not to measure your change by readings that the world tells you to, measure your change on your goals and visions for your life. God puts things in our hearts, and how we line up with those is more important than how we line up to other's expectations or standards.
New Year's RESOLUTIONS don't always work, but New Year's REVOLUTIONS means a new way of life,
The place needed a lot of work. So I replaced the carpet, curtains, flooring, splashed a bit of paint around and did some landscaping. The crowing glory has to be my hardwood deck out the back, replacing the wasteland area the had been there for 30 years. Working in the trades has allowed me to get free plants, and cheaper timber etc, which has really helped on a tight budget. I'm really proud of myself, buying and renovating a home all by myself. The next plan is to build a garden shed!
But that's not what I wanted to talk about. My New Years resolution, (or Revolution) as I like to call them, was an original idea. To get fit. Basically, I had had enough of being called fatty, even though it was mostly in a joking way, and decided to do something about it. I joined the gym.
I have a top-class facility only 2mins drive or 7mins cycle from my place. I have been going for three weeks now, at least 4-5 times per week. It's not the first time I have been to a gym. I used to play a lot of competitive sport and have been through at least a dozen memberships over the years. I used most of them ;). So this is nothing new for me in that sense. I guess what feels new is my attitude. I would say that this time I have some real determination and discipline that hasn't always been there. It's encouraging to know that I have grown in this area.
My first discouragement came after two weeks when I weighed myself, only to see that I was EXACTLY the same weight. 10 hard workouts down and I hadn't shed even one fraction of a KG! It was at this point that my trainer said, "You don't just lose weight instantly, you have to do the ground work and build muscle (which actually adds weight) before you start to lose it. He also said that weight isn't too important, your body shape, and how you feel is what's important.
Anyway... I guess what i'm trying to say is this: In the whole area of change, the most important thing is to keep doing the right thing, the results will take care of themselves. Keep focussed on the goal, put in the work and the rest will happen. Don't allow yourself to get discouraged because things don't happen the way you want them to. It's the longer term that's more important.
So keep doing the hard work, even when it feels like there is no evidence of change or growth or anyone else even noticing a thing. Try not to measure your change by readings that the world tells you to, measure your change on your goals and visions for your life. God puts things in our hearts, and how we line up with those is more important than how we line up to other's expectations or standards.
New Year's RESOLUTIONS don't always work, but New Year's REVOLUTIONS means a new way of life,
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Extroverts at their Most Annoying
I found this last year and have just recently rediscovered it. I find it to be quite humourous because it is often so completely accurate! This is from the book "Introvert Power". Some of them are so true, it's really funny.
The Introvert Power "Extroverts at their Most Annoying" Top 10 List:
10. When everything has to be a PARTY!!
9. When E will not accept that you really want to LEAVE the party.
8. When E talks too much, and says too little.
7. When "E The Intruder" enters your space, uninvited, and handles your stuff.
6. When you go out together and E talks to the stranger sitting beside you.
5. When an E you don't know asks, "Are you okay?" just because you're quiet.
4. When E calls to respond to the e-mail you sent because you didn't want to talk.
3. When E brings someone along to your "one on one" -- as a surprise.
2. When E takes cell phone calls during your time alone.
1. When E assumes every silence is an invitation to TALK.
1. When E talks at length without a single pause.
1. When the above behavior requires you to interrupt in order to speak.
1. When you finally get to speak, and your words remind E of something else to share.
1. When E is oblivious to all attempts to end the conversation, including "goodbye" and walking away.
1. When E pressures you to be enthusiastic like them.
I know people who do some of these things! Of course there is no Introvert list, because introverts are perfect.
Now I have to go and be by myself. All of this social interaction has been quite exhausting.
The Introvert Power "Extroverts at their Most Annoying" Top 10 List:
10. When everything has to be a PARTY!!
9. When E will not accept that you really want to LEAVE the party.
8. When E talks too much, and says too little.
7. When "E The Intruder" enters your space, uninvited, and handles your stuff.
6. When you go out together and E talks to the stranger sitting beside you.
5. When an E you don't know asks, "Are you okay?" just because you're quiet.
4. When E calls to respond to the e-mail you sent because you didn't want to talk.
3. When E brings someone along to your "one on one" -- as a surprise.
2. When E takes cell phone calls during your time alone.
1. When E assumes every silence is an invitation to TALK.
1. When E talks at length without a single pause.
1. When the above behavior requires you to interrupt in order to speak.
1. When you finally get to speak, and your words remind E of something else to share.
1. When E is oblivious to all attempts to end the conversation, including "goodbye" and walking away.
1. When E pressures you to be enthusiastic like them.
I know people who do some of these things! Of course there is no Introvert list, because introverts are perfect.
Now I have to go and be by myself. All of this social interaction has been quite exhausting.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Let it out
I play the drums. I'm not the best in the world, but I enjoy it and usually do a good enough job. Normally, when I play at church, I am located in the back corner behind some clear drum screens, to keep the sound more controllable. These last two weeks I have played in the centre of the stage with no screens! Now this is every drummers ideal position, right in the action, close to the other band members, really feeling the music. I just love it, and it sounds better to most people. Whether the drums stay there or not is not up to me, it's up to the leadership team. And i will be completely happy with whatever decision they make! Of course I have a preference, but the Big Picture should always take priority over an individual's preferences, so I hold on lightly to them. If everyone got what they wanted then life would be a shambles! So if God entrusts certain individuals with leadership, then we should support them 100%. I love my leaders, they are awesome!
So the whole drum screen / positioning thing made me think. Today, I have received, texts, email and facebook messages, and about a dozen people telling me how well i played today. Firstly, thanks, as long as you are worshipping God and not the musicians, I will continue to play like I do, but if you are just enjoying the show, I don't want to play any more! Go watch U2 or something. I don't play for attention, I play to give God attention. But anyway. To all these people complimenting me: I am just playing exactly like I have done for years! The only difference is that now you can see and hear me!
When we take down our walls in life, the same principle applies! We are all awesome people inside, but we hide in the corner with walls up and people never get to see how awesome we are! As soon as my walls were removed, scores of people loved my drumming. But i have always drummed like that! The only difference is that I have let my walls down, so people could see the real me!
I wonder what walls you have in life that you hide behind? Humour, hiding in the corner, intellect, talking too much, talking too little, anger, trying to please everyone all the time, being a religious stiff...
You are still you on the inside, like you have always been! but you may be hiding it. Try letting your walls down and see what may happen! Shock horror, people may actually like what they see! And if they don't, who cares! Someone will like you! And besides, what other people think about you is none of your business anyway!
So the whole drum screen / positioning thing made me think. Today, I have received, texts, email and facebook messages, and about a dozen people telling me how well i played today. Firstly, thanks, as long as you are worshipping God and not the musicians, I will continue to play like I do, but if you are just enjoying the show, I don't want to play any more! Go watch U2 or something. I don't play for attention, I play to give God attention. But anyway. To all these people complimenting me: I am just playing exactly like I have done for years! The only difference is that now you can see and hear me!
When we take down our walls in life, the same principle applies! We are all awesome people inside, but we hide in the corner with walls up and people never get to see how awesome we are! As soon as my walls were removed, scores of people loved my drumming. But i have always drummed like that! The only difference is that I have let my walls down, so people could see the real me!
I wonder what walls you have in life that you hide behind? Humour, hiding in the corner, intellect, talking too much, talking too little, anger, trying to please everyone all the time, being a religious stiff...
You are still you on the inside, like you have always been! but you may be hiding it. Try letting your walls down and see what may happen! Shock horror, people may actually like what they see! And if they don't, who cares! Someone will like you! And besides, what other people think about you is none of your business anyway!
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Observations on the Life of a Fool - Marcus Ardern
Taken from Marcus Ardern's website - Not my own work
Observations on the Life of a Fool
There are other passages than the book of proverbs that record some telling insights about the life of a fool. For example: silly intellectuals lost in the delusion of self admiration and conceits pronounce themselves to be wise men indeed (Romans 1:22).
Also the atheist fool talks to himself in his own heart affirming a statement of his faith in atheism (Psalm 14:1). He has a vested interest that his sins will not be accounted for , having done away in philosophy with both the judge and judgment day, to leave him free to follow his own course. However if the truth has different facts in store his idea or affirmation will be revealed as the foolishness it truly is.
It seems clear to me, in the Scriptures that there is a certain type of person who may be described as a fool. However, it also true that Jesus told us not to judge each other as fools, or we will be in danger of punishment.
This being said we can look at our own lives and see whether we are being foolish, and we can discern whether the other person is foolish or a fool. Discernment and correct assessment does not necessarily lead to us offering condemnation to the other person. It is just that we recognize who we are dealing with and acting accordingly. One of the great gifts given as an evidence of working by The Holy Spirit is the ability to recognize what spirit we are dealing with (1 Corinthians 12:10).
Also the Scriptures are able to make us “wise unto salvation” that means having the wisdom that points to Salvation in the faith in Jesus Christ, or reveals its true nature (2 Timothy 3:15).
King David says in Psalm 119 verse 24 “Thy testimonies are my delight; they are my counselors.” and in verse 128 “Therefore I esteem all Thy precepts concerning all things to be right; and I hate every false way.” For this reason, I think it is good for me to share what I believe the Book of Proverbs teaches concerning foolishness…remembering that Scripture is Gods’ word and is Truth.
The Foolish one and the scoffer and willfully simple one: Are you one of these? Do you have a well earned reputation for high mindedness scoffing and speaking with contempt of others? If you mock and scoff God Himself will scoff at YOU (3:34) and if you live foolishly it will be on display in your life (3:35).
1.
The simpleton loves being shallow and silly. The mocker thinks his scoffing is delightful for himself. Its his way of enjoying himself. Is this you? (1:22)
2.
The foolish one feels prosperous and complacent, but it is his silly self assurance that makes him ignore what will kill him (1:32-33)
3.
The scoffer hates those who offer him advice and correct the errors of his ways. Do you resent those who rebuke you when you deserve it? (9:8) It’s unsafe to rebuke him.
4.
The winking, prating fool will suddenly fall. That one who signals contemptuously with his eyes and lets his mouth run away with him. (10:8-10) see also 10:19
5.
The silly talker has a rod of punishment coming for his own back (10:13)
6.
The foolish person allows himself to become hateful and spreads slander and lies about others (10:18)
7.
When a fool creates mischievous trouble he enjoys it like a sport. It is fun for him (10:23)
8.
An oafish one does not value and highly esteem the feedback that reveals his errors. He grows angry with it (12:1)
9.
The willfully simple person likes the company or wants to follow vain persons or things instead of working (12:11)
10.
The fool is sure he is right (12:15)
11.
When a fool is irritated he lets it be known at once, he does not conceal anything or practice emotional controls (Holy Ghost self control 12:16) he flares up
12.
From within his heart full of foolishness his mouth talks…(12:13
13.
His foolishness is on display in his life (13:16)
14.
He resents his father’s instruction and will not listen (13:1 and 15:5)
15.
If you had walked with wise men you would have been wise but because you walked with the foolish it is destruction you inherit (13:20)
16.
That scoffing one who lacks understanding doesn’t find wisdom if he looks for it, because his scoffing cuts him off from it…(14:6)
17.
A fool loves to joke about the things God calls sin. His humour celebrates things that disgust God. Fools mock at sin. (14:9)
18.
The willfully simple are easily taken in. they are gullible (14:15)
19.
Anger makes you choose silly foolish courses (14:17)
20.
Folly is like a silly crown for a fool (14:24)
21.
The fools mouth is like a tap pouring out with stupidity (15:2)
22.
He does not have the heart to spread good knowledge and does not speak wisdom from the heart (15:7)
23.
His food is foolishness. His mouth feeds on folly (15:14 and 21 he enjoys it.)
24.
His foolishness will bring discipline upon him (16:22)
25.
The foolish one hardly notices when he receives the due results of his errors, the blows that he deserves well (17:10)
26.
Why should the fool waste his money investing in education he chooses to ignore? (17:16)
27.
He rushes into ill considered agreements to go guarantor, making obligations for himself he has not thought carefully through (17:18)
28.
A fool causes his father grief instead of joy (17:21)
29.
The fool is busy day dreaming about far off things instead of considering what is under his nose close at hand (17:24)
30.
If the fool shuts up, he may seem wise (17:28)
31.
The fool loves picking quick quarrels and depicting others as in need of punishment. (18:6)
32.
It is his own mouth that destroys him (18:7)
33.
He is opinionated because he has begun inquiries with his mind already made up with his preconceptions (18:13) this is shameful for him and foolish behaviour.
34.
Delightful life does not suit him, it doesn’t really belong to a person like him (19:10)
35.
God has already provided waiting judgments for the mockers and scoffers. Fitting punishments for the fools (19:29 & 26:3)
36.
Fools love to meddle in other peoples affairs, they love to involve themselves in things that are not at all their business (20:3)
37.
Remove and get rid of the scornful person and peace will reign again (22:10)
38.
A child can remain in foolishness if the parent is not faithful to bring correction (22:15)
39.
No sense instructing the fool because he places no value on your instruction (23:9)
40.
Planning folly in your thoughts is sin and being a scoffer makes you repulsive to other persons (24:9)
41.
There is a nasty heavy presence with the provoked fool (27:3) heavier than a stone. Weightier than sand
42.
If you are wise and contend with the fool he will either try to make a joke of it or grow into a rage losing his temper with you (29:9-11)
43.
Scorners set the town alight but wisdom can quench the angers created (29:8)
I would suggest you often review this list as you inspect your own actions, looking up the scriptures indicated in The Book of Proverbs in your Bible and also look at the list of observations on the wise man.
Thank you for reading this. I believe it will be helpful if you follow it.
© 2009 Marcus Ardern
Observations on the Life of a Fool
There are other passages than the book of proverbs that record some telling insights about the life of a fool. For example: silly intellectuals lost in the delusion of self admiration and conceits pronounce themselves to be wise men indeed (Romans 1:22).
Also the atheist fool talks to himself in his own heart affirming a statement of his faith in atheism (Psalm 14:1). He has a vested interest that his sins will not be accounted for , having done away in philosophy with both the judge and judgment day, to leave him free to follow his own course. However if the truth has different facts in store his idea or affirmation will be revealed as the foolishness it truly is.
It seems clear to me, in the Scriptures that there is a certain type of person who may be described as a fool. However, it also true that Jesus told us not to judge each other as fools, or we will be in danger of punishment.
This being said we can look at our own lives and see whether we are being foolish, and we can discern whether the other person is foolish or a fool. Discernment and correct assessment does not necessarily lead to us offering condemnation to the other person. It is just that we recognize who we are dealing with and acting accordingly. One of the great gifts given as an evidence of working by The Holy Spirit is the ability to recognize what spirit we are dealing with (1 Corinthians 12:10).
Also the Scriptures are able to make us “wise unto salvation” that means having the wisdom that points to Salvation in the faith in Jesus Christ, or reveals its true nature (2 Timothy 3:15).
King David says in Psalm 119 verse 24 “Thy testimonies are my delight; they are my counselors.” and in verse 128 “Therefore I esteem all Thy precepts concerning all things to be right; and I hate every false way.” For this reason, I think it is good for me to share what I believe the Book of Proverbs teaches concerning foolishness…remembering that Scripture is Gods’ word and is Truth.
The Foolish one and the scoffer and willfully simple one: Are you one of these? Do you have a well earned reputation for high mindedness scoffing and speaking with contempt of others? If you mock and scoff God Himself will scoff at YOU (3:34) and if you live foolishly it will be on display in your life (3:35).
1.
The simpleton loves being shallow and silly. The mocker thinks his scoffing is delightful for himself. Its his way of enjoying himself. Is this you? (1:22)
2.
The foolish one feels prosperous and complacent, but it is his silly self assurance that makes him ignore what will kill him (1:32-33)
3.
The scoffer hates those who offer him advice and correct the errors of his ways. Do you resent those who rebuke you when you deserve it? (9:8) It’s unsafe to rebuke him.
4.
The winking, prating fool will suddenly fall. That one who signals contemptuously with his eyes and lets his mouth run away with him. (10:8-10) see also 10:19
5.
The silly talker has a rod of punishment coming for his own back (10:13)
6.
The foolish person allows himself to become hateful and spreads slander and lies about others (10:18)
7.
When a fool creates mischievous trouble he enjoys it like a sport. It is fun for him (10:23)
8.
An oafish one does not value and highly esteem the feedback that reveals his errors. He grows angry with it (12:1)
9.
The willfully simple person likes the company or wants to follow vain persons or things instead of working (12:11)
10.
The fool is sure he is right (12:15)
11.
When a fool is irritated he lets it be known at once, he does not conceal anything or practice emotional controls (Holy Ghost self control 12:16) he flares up
12.
From within his heart full of foolishness his mouth talks…(12:13
13.
His foolishness is on display in his life (13:16)
14.
He resents his father’s instruction and will not listen (13:1 and 15:5)
15.
If you had walked with wise men you would have been wise but because you walked with the foolish it is destruction you inherit (13:20)
16.
That scoffing one who lacks understanding doesn’t find wisdom if he looks for it, because his scoffing cuts him off from it…(14:6)
17.
A fool loves to joke about the things God calls sin. His humour celebrates things that disgust God. Fools mock at sin. (14:9)
18.
The willfully simple are easily taken in. they are gullible (14:15)
19.
Anger makes you choose silly foolish courses (14:17)
20.
Folly is like a silly crown for a fool (14:24)
21.
The fools mouth is like a tap pouring out with stupidity (15:2)
22.
He does not have the heart to spread good knowledge and does not speak wisdom from the heart (15:7)
23.
His food is foolishness. His mouth feeds on folly (15:14 and 21 he enjoys it.)
24.
His foolishness will bring discipline upon him (16:22)
25.
The foolish one hardly notices when he receives the due results of his errors, the blows that he deserves well (17:10)
26.
Why should the fool waste his money investing in education he chooses to ignore? (17:16)
27.
He rushes into ill considered agreements to go guarantor, making obligations for himself he has not thought carefully through (17:18)
28.
A fool causes his father grief instead of joy (17:21)
29.
The fool is busy day dreaming about far off things instead of considering what is under his nose close at hand (17:24)
30.
If the fool shuts up, he may seem wise (17:28)
31.
The fool loves picking quick quarrels and depicting others as in need of punishment. (18:6)
32.
It is his own mouth that destroys him (18:7)
33.
He is opinionated because he has begun inquiries with his mind already made up with his preconceptions (18:13) this is shameful for him and foolish behaviour.
34.
Delightful life does not suit him, it doesn’t really belong to a person like him (19:10)
35.
God has already provided waiting judgments for the mockers and scoffers. Fitting punishments for the fools (19:29 & 26:3)
36.
Fools love to meddle in other peoples affairs, they love to involve themselves in things that are not at all their business (20:3)
37.
Remove and get rid of the scornful person and peace will reign again (22:10)
38.
A child can remain in foolishness if the parent is not faithful to bring correction (22:15)
39.
No sense instructing the fool because he places no value on your instruction (23:9)
40.
Planning folly in your thoughts is sin and being a scoffer makes you repulsive to other persons (24:9)
41.
There is a nasty heavy presence with the provoked fool (27:3) heavier than a stone. Weightier than sand
42.
If you are wise and contend with the fool he will either try to make a joke of it or grow into a rage losing his temper with you (29:9-11)
43.
Scorners set the town alight but wisdom can quench the angers created (29:8)
I would suggest you often review this list as you inspect your own actions, looking up the scriptures indicated in The Book of Proverbs in your Bible and also look at the list of observations on the wise man.
Thank you for reading this. I believe it will be helpful if you follow it.
© 2009 Marcus Ardern
Observations on the life of a wise man - Marcus Ardern
Copied from Marcus Ardern's webpage. This is not my own work! But I really love it!
Observations on the life of a wise man
The bible gives us in the book of Proverbs a portrait of the wise man in comparison to the fool. It becomes clear in life as one looks back that there have been times when one has played the fool, lived foolishly and made foolish decisions that released less than salubrious conditions into our lives. Relationships can be lost or damaged. Reputations can be damaged or one became a pariah among former friends…it makes no sense to wreck the happiness of your own future by continuing in foolishness until we actually qualify for the summary label of being The Fool…
No doubt you would not like to be known as a fool. Even worse if the label is accurate. Solomon himself with all his clever insights and Godly wisdom later admitted he had acted foolishly and given in to sin even though he knew better and had warned others away from it. Knowledge is no protection if it remains unapplied…the word must be made flesh. We must embody the nobler path we know and fortunately God gives insights as it is written in Psalm 16 “Thou wilt show me” (the path of life).
So now we look into the book of proverbs to see the characteristics or outward observable signs of a wise man or woman. Instead of quoting a particular translation I have presented what I believe the verse points to in meaning. You may follow the references in a king James Bible or other translation. I suggest you accept nothing you feel remains unproven by the Bible itself.(acts seventeen verse eleven)
One observation I make after years of careful consideration of the church of believers I have seen in many locations around the globe: many leaders and believers excuse and allow themselves attitudes and beliefs about behaviours that run directly contrary to what Holy Scripture advises. Sooner or later the fruit arrives into the life and result is trouble. The Good News is that God has given us a Person as a Saviour: The Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and that He has made available Truth that sets us free. To reject Gods word is to reject salvation, because The Way of Salvation is itself rejected. You cannot experience right results if you are living wrongly and without repentance. Faith and Obedience to The Gospel is the wisest course. Ultimately it confirms itself as enlightened self interest. The testimony of God is true, so I believe that to reject his testimony is to not know what is false such a man or woman lacks insight and ability to discern distinctions so their assessments, judgments and choices become blurred or downright wrong (blindness or short sightedness, see 2 Peter 1:9).
Here is that look into proverbs:
1.
The wise one listens well and learns (1:5)
2.
The wise one becomes discrete and prudent in life matters and choices (2:10-11)
3.
Being wise brings honourable reputation (3:34-35)
4.
Honestly seeking for and cherishing wisdom yields good dividends! You succeed in finding it and along with that its results: righteousness, a rich and enriched life and glory (8:17-21)
5.
Wisdom gives you extra days (9:11)
6.
Wisdom makes you become teachable instead of chattering and garrulous (10:8)
7.
If you possess real wisdom it makes you eager to learn more and preserve the knowledge. (10:14)
8.
If you have grown in understanding you will know how to hold your peace (11:2)
9.
Less prudent people will end up as your subordinates (11:29)
10.
Real wisdom inspires commendations from others (12:8)
11.
Wisdom is indicated when a man is genuinely interested in learning (12:15)
12.
The wise one does not blab everything he knows even though he may have a veritable fountain of wisdom present to fuel his lips (12:23)
13.
A wise son is willing to really hear his father’s corrections (13:1)
14.
Being well instructed brings favour into your life (13:15)
15.
Wise companions bring wisdom into your life, it is learned from company just as foolishness is (13:20)
16.
A wise woman helps her own house grow and flourish richly (14:1)
17.
Wise speech preserves lives (14:3)
18.
It is easier to learn when you have become a person with understanding (14:6)
19.
Ability to scan and discern (comprehend)the likely outcomes of your choices is “your wisdom”.(14:8)
20.
Right proper reverence is natural to a wise person (the reverence for truth that enables you to take note of and avoid dangers) (14:16)
21.
It is cautious prudence that confers glorious knowledge upon you to be admired. (14:18)
22.
Hidden reservoirs of knowledge are within the heart of a truly wise person, even if they are silent about it (14:33)
23.
A wise person considers how to communicate wisdom effectively to the hearer so that it can be received correctly…(15:2)
24.
Openness to receiving an instructing reproof follows on from having learned to be prudent instead of rash or hasty. (15:5)
25.
The wise person does not enjoy stupidity but walks carefully, discretely, wisely.(15:21)
26.
Living by wise choices will give you very good things. (16:20)
27.
If you are wise, others will report your prudence and good judgment. (16:21)
28.
Wisdom within is revealed by the words of your lips. (16:23)
29.
If you have real wisdom you will deal in a focused way with matters that need immediate attention, under your nose (17:24)
30.
If you are wise, you won’t say much. If you really know, you will be controlled and cool (17:27)
31.
It is wisdom not to allow angers to suddenly rise up nor to draw attentions to wrongs suffered. It is the honourable way to proceed (19:11)
32.
The wise man does not give way to a life of drunkenness which clouds his mind (20:1)
33.
Real wisdom brings treasurable things into your life and teaches you how to conserve them so that the treasure remains in the house instead of being foolishly wasted in premature consumption (21:20)
34.
Wisdom teaches you strategies for dealing with tricky and self confident people who think themselves immune within their protections , like a fortressed city (21:22)
35.
Behaving wisely makes you the offspring that brings joy to your parents (23:24-25)
36.
The wise person builds upon, adds to, his strengths multiplies his powers by becoming strengthened with good advice (24:5)
37.
It is very rewarding to live a wise life and as a result your hopes will not turn out to be futile dreaming (24:14)
38.
The wise one does not act in a rash, ill considered way, but looks for or recognizes possible danger ahead then avoids bad consequences by acting wisely (27:12. also 1:17)
39.
A good source of understanding is to keep hungry for the things of God and for God Himself (28:5)
40.
The wise person stills his anger, restrains himself, until the appropriate time (29:11)
As Malcolm Muggeridge has said “a thing is often best understood by examining its opposites.”
So perhaps you may like to also look at my article on the observations of the fool, also from proverbs. Examine you own behaviours for your own sakes and for the sakes of those around you, and for The Lords sake.
© 2009 Marcus Ardern
Observations on the life of a wise man
The bible gives us in the book of Proverbs a portrait of the wise man in comparison to the fool. It becomes clear in life as one looks back that there have been times when one has played the fool, lived foolishly and made foolish decisions that released less than salubrious conditions into our lives. Relationships can be lost or damaged. Reputations can be damaged or one became a pariah among former friends…it makes no sense to wreck the happiness of your own future by continuing in foolishness until we actually qualify for the summary label of being The Fool…
No doubt you would not like to be known as a fool. Even worse if the label is accurate. Solomon himself with all his clever insights and Godly wisdom later admitted he had acted foolishly and given in to sin even though he knew better and had warned others away from it. Knowledge is no protection if it remains unapplied…the word must be made flesh. We must embody the nobler path we know and fortunately God gives insights as it is written in Psalm 16 “Thou wilt show me” (the path of life).
So now we look into the book of proverbs to see the characteristics or outward observable signs of a wise man or woman. Instead of quoting a particular translation I have presented what I believe the verse points to in meaning. You may follow the references in a king James Bible or other translation. I suggest you accept nothing you feel remains unproven by the Bible itself.(acts seventeen verse eleven)
One observation I make after years of careful consideration of the church of believers I have seen in many locations around the globe: many leaders and believers excuse and allow themselves attitudes and beliefs about behaviours that run directly contrary to what Holy Scripture advises. Sooner or later the fruit arrives into the life and result is trouble. The Good News is that God has given us a Person as a Saviour: The Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and that He has made available Truth that sets us free. To reject Gods word is to reject salvation, because The Way of Salvation is itself rejected. You cannot experience right results if you are living wrongly and without repentance. Faith and Obedience to The Gospel is the wisest course. Ultimately it confirms itself as enlightened self interest. The testimony of God is true, so I believe that to reject his testimony is to not know what is false such a man or woman lacks insight and ability to discern distinctions so their assessments, judgments and choices become blurred or downright wrong (blindness or short sightedness, see 2 Peter 1:9).
Here is that look into proverbs:
1.
The wise one listens well and learns (1:5)
2.
The wise one becomes discrete and prudent in life matters and choices (2:10-11)
3.
Being wise brings honourable reputation (3:34-35)
4.
Honestly seeking for and cherishing wisdom yields good dividends! You succeed in finding it and along with that its results: righteousness, a rich and enriched life and glory (8:17-21)
5.
Wisdom gives you extra days (9:11)
6.
Wisdom makes you become teachable instead of chattering and garrulous (10:8)
7.
If you possess real wisdom it makes you eager to learn more and preserve the knowledge. (10:14)
8.
If you have grown in understanding you will know how to hold your peace (11:2)
9.
Less prudent people will end up as your subordinates (11:29)
10.
Real wisdom inspires commendations from others (12:8)
11.
Wisdom is indicated when a man is genuinely interested in learning (12:15)
12.
The wise one does not blab everything he knows even though he may have a veritable fountain of wisdom present to fuel his lips (12:23)
13.
A wise son is willing to really hear his father’s corrections (13:1)
14.
Being well instructed brings favour into your life (13:15)
15.
Wise companions bring wisdom into your life, it is learned from company just as foolishness is (13:20)
16.
A wise woman helps her own house grow and flourish richly (14:1)
17.
Wise speech preserves lives (14:3)
18.
It is easier to learn when you have become a person with understanding (14:6)
19.
Ability to scan and discern (comprehend)the likely outcomes of your choices is “your wisdom”.(14:8)
20.
Right proper reverence is natural to a wise person (the reverence for truth that enables you to take note of and avoid dangers) (14:16)
21.
It is cautious prudence that confers glorious knowledge upon you to be admired. (14:18)
22.
Hidden reservoirs of knowledge are within the heart of a truly wise person, even if they are silent about it (14:33)
23.
A wise person considers how to communicate wisdom effectively to the hearer so that it can be received correctly…(15:2)
24.
Openness to receiving an instructing reproof follows on from having learned to be prudent instead of rash or hasty. (15:5)
25.
The wise person does not enjoy stupidity but walks carefully, discretely, wisely.(15:21)
26.
Living by wise choices will give you very good things. (16:20)
27.
If you are wise, others will report your prudence and good judgment. (16:21)
28.
Wisdom within is revealed by the words of your lips. (16:23)
29.
If you have real wisdom you will deal in a focused way with matters that need immediate attention, under your nose (17:24)
30.
If you are wise, you won’t say much. If you really know, you will be controlled and cool (17:27)
31.
It is wisdom not to allow angers to suddenly rise up nor to draw attentions to wrongs suffered. It is the honourable way to proceed (19:11)
32.
The wise man does not give way to a life of drunkenness which clouds his mind (20:1)
33.
Real wisdom brings treasurable things into your life and teaches you how to conserve them so that the treasure remains in the house instead of being foolishly wasted in premature consumption (21:20)
34.
Wisdom teaches you strategies for dealing with tricky and self confident people who think themselves immune within their protections , like a fortressed city (21:22)
35.
Behaving wisely makes you the offspring that brings joy to your parents (23:24-25)
36.
The wise person builds upon, adds to, his strengths multiplies his powers by becoming strengthened with good advice (24:5)
37.
It is very rewarding to live a wise life and as a result your hopes will not turn out to be futile dreaming (24:14)
38.
The wise one does not act in a rash, ill considered way, but looks for or recognizes possible danger ahead then avoids bad consequences by acting wisely (27:12. also 1:17)
39.
A good source of understanding is to keep hungry for the things of God and for God Himself (28:5)
40.
The wise person stills his anger, restrains himself, until the appropriate time (29:11)
As Malcolm Muggeridge has said “a thing is often best understood by examining its opposites.”
So perhaps you may like to also look at my article on the observations of the fool, also from proverbs. Examine you own behaviours for your own sakes and for the sakes of those around you, and for The Lords sake.
© 2009 Marcus Ardern
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